Give Until It Hurts

In this new year, I’ve resolved to begin truly living and something I’ve considered is that maybe I should give until it hurts. Have you ever thought about that concept?

I think that we all fall into two camps:

  1. The People Pleasers
  2. The Self Servers

The elusive category is a blend of the two.

The People Pleasers

There’s a thin line between “give until it hurts” and “it’s hurting me watching you say yes to everything”. You know the type: the ones who always do everything for everyone. Bending over backward to go out of their way to make everyone’s most mediocre dreams come true. Going the distance to find the… no. I just can’t continue. I am not a people pleaser, so I can’t even think about the lengths that people go to to make others happy but themselves. Unless you need me to finish that thought, because I could totally do that. I could write a couple more sentences if you think that would help me deliver my thoughts better. Or I could shorten this paragraph because you probably get tired reading long blocks of text.

Get the point?


I tend to hang out on this side of the spectrum.

The Self Servers

I don’t have a long explanation for this one… basically it’s those people who absolutely refuse to do anything unless it benefits themselves.

Need 5 bucks? Need a ride to work? Need a smile? Need a high five?


So how do we Give Until It Hurts?

Simple. You strive to be that blend of a people pleaser and a self server. The kind of person who does go out of his way to make mediocre dreams come true. But also the kind of person who knows when to take care of himself. Walk that fine line! The worst thing that can happen is that you fail by giving of yourself too much.

Think about it like this: pick out something this coming weekend that you want to give to those around you. Your options are to give of your time, your compliments, your smiles, your encouragement, or your prayers (or good vibes if that’s more your style).

Give Your Time Until It Hurts

Find the time to volunteer. Share coffee with a friend in need of a conversation. Offer to assist a coworker on a project if your own are on hold. Go run errands for your grandmother because she can’t get out much anymore. Give your time to yourself by meditating. Give your time until it hurts. Until you realize that you have filled your day with the most you can muster. Go to sleep knowing you made a difference!

Give Your Compliments Until It Hurts

Be nice to people! Find something good to say about as many people as you can… every day. Look to compliment instead of chastise. Keep complimenting until you find that one person you just can’t compliment! Try it, it’s super tough.

Give Your Encouragement Until It Hurts

An encouraging word is worth more to someone struggling than you might realize. A better way to coach is to lift up instead of to tear down. Being positive produces more positive results! Same rule as with compliments, give encouragement until you find the one incorrigible situation. Let me know in the comments section if you can think of one!

Give Your Smiles Until It Hurts

Literally… smile until it hurts. No excuses. I’ll be working on this one personally (in fact, I’ve already written a post about my awesome scowl). Annnnnnnnnnd, I think that this one idea might be the easiest to try first. If you can’t give of your smiles until it hurts then just keep trying. Let’s hope that all that practice will start to put that smile on your face permanently.

Sure, smiling is a somewhat self serving idea, but have you ever seen what a smile can do for others?


Give Until It Hurts

Do the best you can at being the best blend of a People Pleaser and Self Server you can be. Try one of the above 4 ideas! Let me know in the comments below which one you are committing to for this weekend (and feel free to swing back by to let me know how it went, too!).

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  1. I’m going to give my time this weekend. I’m going to go get some more items for the community pantry and I’m going to be purging my closet this weekend and donating a lot of that stuff!

      1. Probably just donate all of that to Goodwill. I don’t have a bunch of clothes to give away (yet) but I have a ton of stuff that just needs to go. I’ll probably post up a few of the nicer things on Facebook and see if anyone wants them.

  2. Friday will be my opportunity to give back to some of my most favorite customers….It’s not giving till it hurts but delivering doughnuts will be a great chance to make these folks smile and hopefully encourage them to do something for someone else this weekend !!!…it’s the little things we can do that sometimes make the difference..!!